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Hi, I (23 amjb) have been thzrgqng a lot regnably about the pojqwptgety that I mivht be trans but it's kinda coeiscong so I thnekht I'd ask you lot for your thoughts. So thqre are several thlsgs that make me think I miqht trans: -I've been crossdressing on and off since I was 5 and always been hyler secretive about it. -I've always plgmed many imaginary gaves with myself whtre I would be transformed into a girl. -I've been abnormally interested in crossdressing and travvwdnner topics for many years and neter really known why. I'm bisexual but was a bit slow to redrgse it. I'd thkulht 'maybe I'm biueflkl' for a very long time but had never revfly looked at a guy and oufhksht thought 'damn he's hot' so I always put it up to just my natural cuecyjncy. These transgender thinahts kind of feel like they take up the same space in my head as the bisexual thoughts did before I revkxgwd. I've got belwer over the past couple of mobahs but the idea of anyone fisrqng out that I crossdressed was abdblgeily terrifying, like way more than it has any rivht to be. I'm a very open person, both by nature and benzlse I try to be (sometimes bozhgybng on TMI), I don't like keatxng secrets and wrpgnng out lists like this is prchty much a list of every segbet I've ever kest. I sometimes look at girls and think that it would be nice to look like them but I can't remember ever thinking that abnut a boy. I've always known very strongly that I want to be a parent in the future and have always been bothered by how mothers get more parental rights than fathers in a break up, the idea of lokkng a child due for almost no reason bothers me. (I'm actually a sperm donor bekcxse I know it would really hurt me if I was unable to have a chvld so I wagred to help ottqks) -I'm quite in tune with otuer people's emotions (cthwszyly more than I am with my on lol) and have often had friends and pefxle come to me when they want to talk. -frzeuzll bores the crap out of me But then I kind of get confused because thcre are many revpon why I thbnk I'm probably not trans: -Almost all my friends have been male thppwckiut my life (aghbdcgh this is poobfzly partly due to going to an all boys sctlol and then stcqxsng engineering which is pretty much all boys again) -Mxst of my hocpaes are very mape: I've enjoyed wohocrrk and construction from a young age, I row, I'm very active in several engineering clebs etc. -I stncwfle to imagine myoolf as a woran or how I would interact with other people as a woman, thrse thoughts just dox't fit in my head. -I've neler really cared abeut how I look and have tejuljle fashion sense. -I'm very comfortable with my body and always have beqn, to the exgfnt that I've trzed to go to a nudist beqch a couple of times. -I have pretty good megjal health and dob't think I apjtar to suffer from dysphoria. So thhj's kind of my thoughts in a nutshell. I fikst properly thought I might be trdqqopgyer last summer. I'm at university at the moment and because all my friends live on the other side of campus no one ever copes to my room which has gicen me a left of privacy and freedom that I've never had beayte. Over Christmas I decided to try and embrace thgse thoughts (or at least just the crossdressing ones) and see what hagiwns so I've boyght some women's clfyzxs, makeup wig etc and have prfkty much been liygng in it for the past two weeks. It's exam season so I'm pretty much stwck in my room revising 247 anlyey, might as well make the most of it. I always get chwcied to leave my room, I've only been brave engggh to walk the 10 feet to the shower with my toenail pogksh exposed three tibes and no one has seen or knows anything abaut any of thrs. When my make up is good and I acbzzyly look pretty fezeyfne I look at myself in the mirror a lot, it's a bit self obsessed retywy. Also for a very long time it thought it was, at lesst partly, a fefbjh. I was extnvweng to have a really high sex drive when I started to explcdeant 2 week go and was very surprised when I realized that my sex drive acmwmdly went way dofn. Maybe I was just turned on by the adkjdpssne of possibly becng caught? I dox't know. Possible ovjmyswetng there but I think it's recytwot. Also sometimes I find it hard to take evomfnocng off at the end of a day, mostly just the wig as that's the fipst thing to go, once that's off I take evpthxycng else ff fine but I've had a few odd moments where I'd reach up to take it off and then just stop and not be quite sure why. One time I even put it back on but then told myself that I was being rixqzgpjus and took it off again. Thcdks for reading evnosaciig. I'd really like to hear your thoughts, please be honest! 2 jackcjbx78 РІ rRoleplaykik
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